Mission Viejo's nicu team has been harassing my ob and perinatogist to get me out of this hospital all day. They are not comfortable with caring for Zoe should we have to deliver. So the Ambulance is being set up and I am being transferred to St Josephs in Orange next to CHOC.
I of course upset and overwhelmed. Mostly because this means my wonderful ob and perinatolgist will no longer be my care givers. We have a wonderful relationship and I am comfortable with them. It just plain sucks.
So far I have been pretty stable with controlling the contractions. So off to St Josephs where I will again be stabized and given the second steroid shot. They will then proceed to decrease the magnesium, which scares me. It was the only thing that gained control yesterday. They will then switch me to oral meds. Hopefully the process doesnt start up again. If all is good I hope to be sent home on medication and spend the rest of this pregnancy on strict bedrest.
Stay put baby girl!
Friday, April 29
Live from Mission Hospital Labor and Delivery
Well, I spoke a little too soon that things were going well. Yesterday morning I was questioning Braxton Hicks vs contractions paired with some issues arising from the loss of our boy. Dr. M asked that I go to labor and delivery just as a precaution. Well good thing I did. Once I was hooked up, poked, prodded - the contractions skyrocketed to moderate pain happening every 6 minutes then 4 minutes. I also has aow grade fever suggesting an infection, possibly uterine.
Two shots of turbulene and the contractions would quickly subside. Once them meds wore off they were back and even more frequent. Next was a dose of procadia and some other pill, worked for a short time. I didnt like either of these drugs as they make you heart race way too much.
Talks began about premature delivery being a possibility. In anticipation of this worse case senario and for Zoe's best chance I received my first shot of steriods. Ouch! Around 7:30 I was hooked up to an IV with antibiotics and magnesium, the big guns to stop contractions. It was a long bumpy night and we met with the neonatologist to discuss an of action should we be forced to deliver. Around 2 am my contractions were 10, 15, even 30 minutes apart. Less painful and shorter. I broke down and took an ambein for sleep after watching the royal wedding. Four hours of none or one contractions! Drs are pleased.
Now I am waiting for the next blood drawand steroid shot.
My perinatologist just walked in with some news. Mission's neonatology team is uncomfortable with me here should I go into labor due to Zoe's condition. The plan is to possibly transfer me to St Josephs and CHoC in orange, if a doctor is comfortable with accepting our situation, or to Presbyterian Hospital and CHLA. It is understandable why a do odor may not want me. So we will see where this goes.
Zoe needs to stay put for many more weeks. Please keep us in your thoughts that we overcome yet another obstacle. Obviously we are sacred, but are trusting that we have a wonderful team to care for our family.
Two shots of turbulene and the contractions would quickly subside. Once them meds wore off they were back and even more frequent. Next was a dose of procadia and some other pill, worked for a short time. I didnt like either of these drugs as they make you heart race way too much.
Talks began about premature delivery being a possibility. In anticipation of this worse case senario and for Zoe's best chance I received my first shot of steriods. Ouch! Around 7:30 I was hooked up to an IV with antibiotics and magnesium, the big guns to stop contractions. It was a long bumpy night and we met with the neonatologist to discuss an of action should we be forced to deliver. Around 2 am my contractions were 10, 15, even 30 minutes apart. Less painful and shorter. I broke down and took an ambein for sleep after watching the royal wedding. Four hours of none or one contractions! Drs are pleased.
Now I am waiting for the next blood drawand steroid shot.
My perinatologist just walked in with some news. Mission's neonatology team is uncomfortable with me here should I go into labor due to Zoe's condition. The plan is to possibly transfer me to St Josephs and CHoC in orange, if a doctor is comfortable with accepting our situation, or to Presbyterian Hospital and CHLA. It is understandable why a do odor may not want me. So we will see where this goes.
Zoe needs to stay put for many more weeks. Please keep us in your thoughts that we overcome yet another obstacle. Obviously we are sacred, but are trusting that we have a wonderful team to care for our family.
Wednesday, April 27
Zoe Renée, CHLA, and stuff
Zoe Renée- life reborn
That is our baby girl's name. Pretty fitting? We think so. I have always loved the name Zoe and have been bouncing it around for a few years. B warmed up to it especially after learning the meaning - life. Little did I know how much meaning that name would have now that we are faced with our challenges. Reneé is my baby sister's middle name. We lost her many years ago after a long battle against cancer just before her 4th birthday. I was 14 years old. I wanted to honor her and have her name live on. Even more fitting as Renée means reborn. May this name give our little girl the strength to over come and have a long and beautiful life.
Now on to the appointment at CHLA...
Last Friday we had our first appointment with the fetal cardiologist at Children's Hospital of Los Angeles. After a frazzling hour and a half drive there, it was so nice to be welcomed by the kindest staff.
Quickly we were whisked away to meet Dr. P who was so warm and caring. He proceeded to perform a detailed ultrasound of Zoe's heart. He couldn't get all the pictures he needed as our litte girl is always so stubborn. He went on to explain to us that Zoe has the typical Hypoplastic Left Heart Syndrome and suggests we continue to seek care at CHLA. For once Brian and I were releived that we didn't receive even further bad news. I managed to keep the tears under control until the very end.
The rest of the appointment was talking about the team that will be providing care for both Zoe and myself. They are going to help us through the insurance process and get this show on the road.
Our goal is to have my care transferred to the hospital next to CHLA. I do not want to give birth to Zoe in Mission Viejo as she will quickly be stabilized and transported to CHLA which is well over an hour away. It is hard enough knowing that we will not have those glorious moments of bonding after her arrival. With delivering next door to CHLA, B will be able to go with Zoe and stay with her. As soon as I am recovered I can be wheeled over to see her.
Our next appointment is June 2nd for a followup ultrasound and meeting Dr. Starnes. This is so exciting! He is the best surgeon and everyone raves about him. Google and you will see.
So here are some not so great things going on with me:
Severe carpal tunnel. I am in braces and constant pain. My fingers and thumbs are numb. Unfortunately this has really put a damper on sleep, for some reason the pain is unbearable at night. I am waiting to get in to a orthopedic surgeon and hopefully come up with a pain management plan.
I failed the one hour glucose test. The cut off is 130 - my level was 169! Yesterday I endured the three hour test after swigging down 100 grams of sugar water. Pretty disgusting. Nothing like being spun out on sugar while stuck in a doctors office for hours. Fingers are crossed that I pass and do not have gestational diabetes.
My feet are swelling into balloons. I do not even recognize them. To alleviate I have been instructed to drink even more water and spend as much time lying on my left side as possible.
Now for the fun stuff!
Today I am 26 weeks and 2 days along! Less then 14 weeks left to go before Zoe's big debut!
There is a crib, glider, and side table in the nursery! B also put in a lot of work in fixing up the closet.
I bought a sewing machine in plans of making Zoe's bedding. So far I have completed a toss pillow for the glider and cut out the bed skirt. A bit time consuming due to my hand issues, but it will be done. I will be posting some pictures later.
A few weekends ago B joined me for a cloth diapering class. I left with almost all of our newborn/early stages of diapers. I spent to entire days prepping the prefolds and they are oh so soft. Gotta love the fluff!
That is our baby girl's name. Pretty fitting? We think so. I have always loved the name Zoe and have been bouncing it around for a few years. B warmed up to it especially after learning the meaning - life. Little did I know how much meaning that name would have now that we are faced with our challenges. Reneé is my baby sister's middle name. We lost her many years ago after a long battle against cancer just before her 4th birthday. I was 14 years old. I wanted to honor her and have her name live on. Even more fitting as Renée means reborn. May this name give our little girl the strength to over come and have a long and beautiful life.
Now on to the appointment at CHLA...
Last Friday we had our first appointment with the fetal cardiologist at Children's Hospital of Los Angeles. After a frazzling hour and a half drive there, it was so nice to be welcomed by the kindest staff.
Quickly we were whisked away to meet Dr. P who was so warm and caring. He proceeded to perform a detailed ultrasound of Zoe's heart. He couldn't get all the pictures he needed as our litte girl is always so stubborn. He went on to explain to us that Zoe has the typical Hypoplastic Left Heart Syndrome and suggests we continue to seek care at CHLA. For once Brian and I were releived that we didn't receive even further bad news. I managed to keep the tears under control until the very end.
The rest of the appointment was talking about the team that will be providing care for both Zoe and myself. They are going to help us through the insurance process and get this show on the road.
Our goal is to have my care transferred to the hospital next to CHLA. I do not want to give birth to Zoe in Mission Viejo as she will quickly be stabilized and transported to CHLA which is well over an hour away. It is hard enough knowing that we will not have those glorious moments of bonding after her arrival. With delivering next door to CHLA, B will be able to go with Zoe and stay with her. As soon as I am recovered I can be wheeled over to see her.
Our next appointment is June 2nd for a followup ultrasound and meeting Dr. Starnes. This is so exciting! He is the best surgeon and everyone raves about him. Google and you will see.
So here are some not so great things going on with me:
Severe carpal tunnel. I am in braces and constant pain. My fingers and thumbs are numb. Unfortunately this has really put a damper on sleep, for some reason the pain is unbearable at night. I am waiting to get in to a orthopedic surgeon and hopefully come up with a pain management plan.
I failed the one hour glucose test. The cut off is 130 - my level was 169! Yesterday I endured the three hour test after swigging down 100 grams of sugar water. Pretty disgusting. Nothing like being spun out on sugar while stuck in a doctors office for hours. Fingers are crossed that I pass and do not have gestational diabetes.
My feet are swelling into balloons. I do not even recognize them. To alleviate I have been instructed to drink even more water and spend as much time lying on my left side as possible.
Now for the fun stuff!
Today I am 26 weeks and 2 days along! Less then 14 weeks left to go before Zoe's big debut!
There is a crib, glider, and side table in the nursery! B also put in a lot of work in fixing up the closet.
I bought a sewing machine in plans of making Zoe's bedding. So far I have completed a toss pillow for the glider and cut out the bed skirt. A bit time consuming due to my hand issues, but it will be done. I will be posting some pictures later.
A few weekends ago B joined me for a cloth diapering class. I left with almost all of our newborn/early stages of diapers. I spent to entire days prepping the prefolds and they are oh so soft. Gotta love the fluff!
Sunday, April 10
Our little boy
Now for the post that I have not wanted to write for two weeks. It is brief, I just don't have words to express how I am feeling.
We lost our little boy just before twenty two weeks. His condition was obviously worse then anyone could detect. Our hearts are heavy and there are a lot of tears. We miss him dearly. This has been very hard for me to talk about since I am still pregnant with our little girl. Every time I feel our little girl I am reminded of what is missing. In my heart I have to believe that he left us to give his sister a fighting chance at life.
We had such dreams of teaching him how to surf, playing tennis with his dad, learn all the things boys do, and being a brother to his twin sister. How quickly these dreams have escaped us. Our days will always be filled with wonders of what life could have been. Instead of all the things a couple looks forward to as parents, we now have to plan for a proper farewell for our boy after the birth of our little girl.
Fortunately we went for a 3D ultrasound just before we lost him. Our hearts are so thankful to have had the chance to see what he looked like. We have had many standard black and white ultrasounds, but this was amazing. He was always very active, kicking his sister around. He also loved to put his hands up by his head.
Here are a few of the last pictures of our sweet boy at 21 weeks and 3 days.
This was taken about a month ago, but he was giving us the thumbs up that everything will be ok...
Farewell our sweet little boy. You will live forever in our hearts.
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